If you have a spare 12 minutes...

Watch this inspired, high-paced video discussion on happiness.  You will have a few laughs as positive psychologist Shawn Achor discusses our ability to positively shape our reality and create our own happiness. 

Happy Mother's Day to all!

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. - Tenneva Jordan

What are some techniques that help you stay positive?

My friend told me about a great "game" to play whenever you are in a situation that isn't working out the way you want it to.  Ask yourself, "what do I like about this situation"?  Take a moment and really think about it.  Try and find the good in a situation.  For example, I was on a cramped airplane yesterday.  I was tired, and of course, lucky enough to get the middle seat in the last row.  To add to it, I wanted to watch the tv program, but had misplaced my earphones.  Feeling frustrated, I remembered what my friend told me and I asked myself, "what do I like about this situation," and after some thought I realized, "hey, it is pretty cool that I am sitting in a chair, flying, at 40,000 feet in the sky".  It was also pretty cool that since my earphones were missing, I would take the remaining time on the flight and read, something I rarely feel I have the time to do.  I felt better right away.  It didn't take away the fact that I was sitting in the middle seat, but by switching my focus to more positive thoughts, it made it just that little bit better.  So next time, when you are getting hyped up, focusing on the negative, ask yourself that question and you will find it helps you train your mind to think differently, positively.  

Here are some other techniques I pulled from this website:  

1. Never respond when you are not calm. If you are not sure that you are calm, don’t respond. Take time to calm yourself down first.
2. Realize that you can find opportunities in negative situations. Albert Einstein said: “In the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.”
3. Look at the content of what people say to you for something positive that you can act upon to improve yourself. Don’t just reject the whole messages.
4. For the rest of the messages which is negative, simply ignore it.
5. Realize that having negative feelings will just hurt you, not them. So there is no reason for you to have any negative feeling.
6. If you make mistakes, remember this quote by George Bernard Shaw: “A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.”
7. Talk to a positive friend who can encourage you.
8. Remember your favorite quotes to give you inspiration and motivation. This is one reason why you should have quote of the day.
9. Look at the negative situations as your training sessions for real life. The higher you climb in life, the worse the negative situations would be, so you’d better be prepared for them.
10. Realize that you can’t please everyone. In fact, nobody can. Sometimes you need to just let some people go. Realizing this will relieve you from a lot of unnecessary burden so that you can focus on the people that you can positively interact with.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Choices

We make choices every day from “do I wear the teal or peacock shirt to dinner” to “low fat or fat free yogurt?” to “should I hit ‘send’?” Remember, the choices you make about how to cope with stress and occupy your time may have a lasting impact on the lives of you and your loved ones. (How to make smart decisions in less than 60 seconds and yes, sometimes it does-and should-take longer)

Tonight's Happy Hour

Don't forget about tonight's happy hour at Oakwood to discuss unaccompanied tours.  For any questions about the event, call 202-647-3179 or email FLOaskUT@state.gov.

See you there!

If you have kids...

This website has some good ideas about how to help your young children best cope during the employee's time away from home.


Happy Monday!

Give your stress wings...

....and let it fly away.  ~Terri Guillemets

If only.

Since most of us can’t do that, on Thursday April 26, 2012 we will host a tele-conference with MHN covering the  topic of “Coping with the Stress of Change”.  We will discuss the challenges of change, identify different aspects of the change process and describe different ways to modify your stress responses to change.  RSVP to floaskut@state.gov.   Please provide your name and employee’s post of assignment and let us know if you would prefer to call in or join us in person.  If you do not have a state badge or diplomatic passport, please let us know so someone will be available to escort you.

I like this extract from Wikipedia defining stress, because reading it, I actually start to feel stressed:  

The ambiguity in defining this phenomenon was first recognized by Hans Selye in 1926 who loosely described stress as something that "…in addition to being itself, was also the cause of itself, and the result of itself." First to use the term in a biological context, Selye continued to define stress as "the non-specific response of the body to any demand placed upon it." Present-day neuroscientists including Bruce McEwen and Jaap Koolhaas believe that stress, based on years of empirical research, "should be restricted to conditions where an environmental demand exceeds the natural regulatory capacity of an organism."  

Some more fun quotes about stress…

Stress should be a powerful driving force, not an obstacle.  ~Bill Phillips 

There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them.  ~Sylvia Plath 

Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.  ~Ovid
 For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.  ~Lily Tomlin 

The mark of a successful man is one that has spent an entire day on the bank of a river without feeling guilty about it.  ~Author Unknown

Read these 41 random, alarming facts about stress.

Cheers to Happy Hour!

You invited to an Unaccompanied Tour Informational Happy Hour!  It will take place on Wednesday, May 2, at the Oakwood Falls Church. It will be held in the State Room, and will run from 6:30 p.m. until 9 p.m. or so.


Like other AAFSW happy hours, this will be a time to relax, meet other folks from the Foreign Affairs community and ask questions of current AAFSW members.  Since a greater number of employees and families are considering UTs,  the Unaccompanied Tour will be the focal point of the discussion.

The tentative agenda is as follows:

6:30 p.m Refreshments, mix and mingle 

7:00 p.m. Presentation by FLO (UT TEAM), followed by a Q&A

7:30 p.m. Presentation by Transition Center (FSI) staff, followed by Q&A

8:00 p.m. Panel of EFMs who have experienced or are currently experiencing an unaccompanied tour

8:30 p.m. Wrap-up

There is a great panel of EFMs lined up and we are very excited that so many will be attending the event.  Please remember that this is a no-cost event sponsored by AAFSW and please feel free to attend even if you are only toying with the notion of a UT. 

If you will be in the area and have any interest in attending, please send a note to jdinoia@yahoo.com or FLOaskUT@state.gov with your name and your UT status (considering, anticipating, in the middle of, completed & would like to offer assistance/advice).  See you there!

It's a Kodak moment!

                     

                 UT Team with our Director and Secretary Clinton on December 14th, 2011

Returning from Afghanistan to best friend...

Special Invitation:
Panel Discussion on Third-Culture Kids and the Foreign Service Experience

April 2 at 11:30 am

 

The American Foreign Service Association (AFSA) cordially invites you to attend a special panel discussion taking place at AFSA headquarters, 2101 E St NW, at 11:30 am on Monday, April 2.

Four nationally-renowned experts on third-culture kids (TCKs) will be on hand to discuss emotional resilience in TCKs, with a special emphasis on the Foreign Service experience. Why do some kids take well to life in the Foreign Service while others struggle? What sets kids up for success within this life? How can parents best position their children for achievement as Foreign Service brats? Our expert panelists are international educational consultant Rebecca Grappo, cross-cultural specialist Ruth Van Reken, author Julia Simens, and educator/consultant Rebecca Oden. They will be happy to entertain questions from the audience following the formal conversation.

All AFSA events are open to the public and are free of charge. Please feel free to forward this to anyone who might have an interest in the subject matter. We ask that all RSVPs be sent to events@afsa.org. If you are overseas or otherwise unable to participate, the event will be taped and made available on the AFSA web site (www.afsa.org/AFSAvideos.aspx) shortly after the program.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees

for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.

You only have to let the soft animal of your body

love what it loves.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

Meanwhile the world goes on.

Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain

are moving across the landscapes,

over the prairies and the deep trees,

the mountains and the rivers.

Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,

are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,

the world offers itself to your imagination,

call to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting –

over and over announcing your place

in the family of things.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

            Mary Oliver

Overload?

I have heard from a lot of people that everything seems to be happening all at once in 2012.  Is this happening to you?  It is to me!  So...  

For ten ideas to make your life easier - click here.  Ideas include, actually eating leftovers, and telling yourself it is ok if your house doesn't look as pristine as Pottery Barn magazines...

To help you sleep, think about incorporating sour cherries into your diet (weird, right?).  For more ZzzZZz food ideas, click here.  

Don't get too caught up in the chaos of every day.  Stay on track and remember what you really want to be doing with each day.  Check out this article on bucket lists.  What is on your bucket list?  As Eleanor Roosevelt famously said, "The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience." 


And remember, check out MHN's website for articles on long distance relationships, marriage, stress, coping skills etc.  You can also call them at any time to speak with a counselor.  For information on how to access the website, please contact us at FLOaskUT@state.gov.

Ideas to make staying in touch easier...

Check out this article from Real Simple magazine about creative ways to stay in touch with family and friends while away.

Spring Ahead, Fall Back

Spring Ahead, Fall Back!       

It’s that time of year…. already.  Sunday, March 11 2012 at 2 A.M. you need to move your clocks ahead one hour.  Spring, on the other hand will not arrive until March 20^th.

Daylight Saving Time was first instituted to save energy for war production during World War I.  When it was first instituted it occurred between April and October.  After World War I states and communities could choose to continue to observe it or not. During World War II the federal government once again required the states observe the time change.  In 1966, Congress passed the Uniform Time Act standardizing the Daylight Saving Time.  In 2007 the Energy Policy Act of 2005 was put into place, causing Daylight Saving Time to be four weeks longer.   The policy was supposed to save 10,000 barrels of oil each day through reduced power by businesses in the daylight hours.  The reality is it is very hard to determine energy savings and some theorize we don’t save anything at all and we might even use more energy.

You might be surprised to learn Arizona (except for some Indian Reservations) Hawaii, Puerto Rico, the U.S. Virgin Islands and the American Samoa do not observe Daylight Savings Time. 

Me I don’t like the change.  Why?  Because now for another month it will be dark when I walk the dogs and the added light at night doesn’t really help me accomplish anything. 

                                                                                                          

What are your thoughts?  Do you like Daylight Savings?  Do you think it saves energy? 

I get by with a little YELP from my friends...

If you are new to town or just looking for a new place to eat or get your hair cut you may want to Yelp it. This site is a great place to read reviews and get ideas on all kinds of places and things. One person wrote in to say she saved two hundred dollars by Yelping her dog’s veterinarian - seems the first vet with whom she had an appointment was very expensive but with the help of Yelp (www.yelp.com) she found someone less expensive and just as good. Woof! (Note: most Yelp sites are US cities only)

To start the weekend...

“I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living.” 

― Dr. Seuss

Being separated from your loved one isn't easy and we could all use some advice and creative tips on how to make it just a little bit easier.  FSI developed a course focused on maintaining and strengthening long distance relationships.  I took the two and half hour course last year and thought it was not only helpful, but also entertaining and fun.  You will have the opportunity to hear from others who are preparing for or are experiencing time apart and learn what has and hasn't worked for them.   The course is being offered next Wednesday, Feb. 29th. at FSI so sign up today!  Email FSITCTraining@state.gov to enroll.  

 

Peek inside...

Take a look at these recent photos of life inside U.S. Embassy Baghdad.  Also, have you seen U.S. Embassy Kabul's flickr photos?  Check them out here.  Don't forget you can follow U.S. Embassy Baghdad, Kabul, and Islamabad on Facebook and Twitter.   

Happy Valentine's Day!

Wishing you all a Happy Valentine's Day and....